At a dinner party the other night one of the family dogs, Lucy, got scared from the flames of a fire that was made to toast marshmallows in and we were all amazed to see the other family dog, Bubbles, grab a hold of Lucy’s neck with her teeth to calm her down. The concept stuck and Gretchen could not help but bite my neck all evening. “Could ya stop doing that?” I asked after her fourth attempt.

The Mukester is still with us and even though I am astonished to find that I am the next Dr. friggin’ Doolittle with neighborhood animals coming out of the woodwork to talk to me I still refuse to stop and chat with dog owners just because our dogs are sniffing butts.

Mornings are not my own anymore with Muki at my feet chewing incessantly on anything she can find. My office looks like a doggy playground with bones and unstuffed animals strewn about. The carpet that was two months ago a beautiful soft gray is now brown from Muki’s paws and my desk is covered with shoes and other items that I have torn out of Muki’s jaws before they are completely destroyed.

When Wade comes into my office to kiss me good morning he is met with my guard dog. “Good morning Muki,” he says sweetly as she backs away and growls at him. “Muki, Muki, come here Muki…..ya bitch,” he says retreating.

When he comes home from work Muki runs under the dining table and her ears flatten. “Muki, I’m home,” he calls attune to Jack Nicholson in The Shining. He goes through phases with her, trying really hard and then speaking in his Shining voice or giving her treats and then smacking her on the behind with a newspaper when she poops on his side of the floor of our bedroom. “You’re reeling her in and then pushing her away,” I warn him. “I don’t think Cesar would commend that.” “F Cesar,” he replies.

But Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer, has become an integral part of our training. At first Cesar’s entire first episode from Netflix sat unopened for three weeks with Wade and the boys refusing to watch it but as the weeks continued with Muki resisting Wade’s charms we finally all sat down to discover Cesar’s secrets. When it was over Wade stood in the doorway, legs apart and hands on his imaginary holster, Wa, Wa (that’s Wade’s cowboy noise he makes when he means business), “Muki, it’s time you and I went for a walk,” he said hitching her to a leash and leading her out the door. She still hates him.

We now watch Cesar every night and Wade still perseveres vacillating between loving and hating Muki. Also, the boys and I trudge all the way to Glenwood Springs once a week to learn from Mark who trains out of Petco. As Mark tells me that I have to make sure that Muki and I “look” into each other’s eyes so that she learns to look at me for commands I am distracted by the boys who have crawled up onto the shelves and are splayed out on top of the sacks of dog food. “Come,” I sternly whisper to them and I look at Mark apologetically. But Mark has a way with animals and I guess I am one of them so he looks at me and quietly smiles, the words are not necessary.

To be continued…..

Click on link to see Muki with the boys: muki and the boys

Photo Courtesy of Cathy Miller

After a weekend at The Viceroy Hotel it is to be expected that I would experience some sort of emotional let down when I returned home and what could be better to lift the spirits than driving eight hours in one day to pick up our new puppy, Muki? I’ll tell you in a nanosecond!

Enter Muki, a fifteen week old white fur ball with paws as soft and cushy as sea sponge, chocolate markings and green eyes that my nephew Devon says resemble the inside of a blueberry. She is intelligent, sweet and lives to please and we can tell that if we put our time and effort into it she will be an easy study but there is one enormous psychologically draining glitch that we did not anticipate, Muki appears to be a “Velcro” dog. Ask me how I skipped that description on the Spanish Water Dog website? I went back to read all of the information at 2:00am when I couldn’t sleep because I was so distraught that Muki had no desire to bond with anybody but me, and the absolute last thing I need is another attachment, and this is what I read:

“Spanish Water Dogs are very intelligent, faithful, energetic and happy dogs.  Sometimes they are known as “velcro” dogs and usually stick very close to their owners.”

Note to self: When doing research don’t get blind-sided by words like “intelligent” and read more thoroughly.

After three days I called the breeder in a panic telling them of Muki’s behavior, “She completely ignores the boys, growls and runs away from Wade whenever he comes into the room, and ferociously barks and lunges after other dogs when on walks,” I said choking back my tears.

When I called my mother and told her that I had asked what their return policy was, she said that I sounded like that woman who sent her son on a one-way flight back to Moscow with a note saying he was violent and had severe psychological problems.

My mother, always bringing light and humor to my anxiety, suggested that we get another puppy, one for the kids and one for me. She also told me to let the puppy sleep in the bed with the boys for the bonding. Problems solved! I said, “Just as I will always be like you, spontaneous, optimistic and often impulsive, Muki will always be like her mother, on the extreme side of shy and nervous and a one person dog,” character traits that were revealed to me the day before she was flying to us.

On Thursday I decided that it would be a good idea to leave the family alone with Muki for a short period of time and so I hopped on my bike and took off. Twenty minutes into the ride Brevitt called me sobbing so hard that I could barely understand what he was saying. He had been working so hard with Muki in these past few days, they all had, showering her with gentle love, feeding her, walking her on the leash, trying to train her and play with her but she was not responding.

I told Brevitt to listen to what I had to say and when I finished I asked him to repeat to me what resonated with him most, “you said something about a dog whisperer and that because I am like a dog I should practice being the Alpha-leader and that I need to calm down and drink some water,” he said between sobs.

There is no question that our family is receiving valuable lessons as we work through this extremely emotional time and I firmly believe that this dog has come into our lives for a reason. Brevitt is showing me perseverance: 

Axel understanding:

and Tucker acceptance: Photo Courtesy of Cathy Miller

As for Wade? He is once again showing his true colors. Where any other husband would turn his back and say, “I told you so,” Wade is convincing me, as Muki bares her teeth at him, that we cannot give up so quickly and that we have to try and make it work.

Each day brings progress and greater insight into our family as a whole and I am hoping that I will not forever rue the day that I chose to pick up Muki without bringing the boys.

In the meantime, we will, “explore the deeper dimensions present in a relationship with a dog,” as stated in the highly recommended book, “Raising Your Dog with the Monks of New Skete,” and do our best to create a family bond with Muki and to detach the prongs that cling her to me so aggressively.